Let's Say Goodbye to the R-Word

Do you see things on Facebook that you find offensive? I'm not talking about grammatical errors and spelling mistakes (although, yes, those are annoying), or the fact that your brother supports the conservatives (equally annoying). I'm talking about comments, posts or photos shared that have you shutting down the computer in disgust, and going to rant to your husband about the insensitivity of other human beings. Today I commented on a photo that a friend had shared, and was appalled to see someone else commented using the R-word. What she was really trying to say was that the photo (and situation/context) was ridiculous or stupid. Instead, she used a derogatory word - perhaps because she is unaware of its meaning, or perhaps because she is just plain mean.

If this woman was my friend, I would have sent her a private message and kindly asked her not to use that word anymore. But because she was a friend of a friend, the situation was a little awkward. So what I decided to do instead was to share this wonderful website with all of my Facebook friends, so that we could start an important conversation - hopefully one that might continue at the dinner table tonight.

This is not about being "politically correct" - this is about recognizing that a word is offensive and hateful, and should no longer be a part of our vocabulary. People with intellectual and/or physical disabilities do not deserve to be associated with a word that means "dumb" or "stupid."

So check out this great website with your children, and start a discussion. Spread the word to end the word!

Kids and Pets

Like many couples, my husband and I had a pet before we had children. Darcy the pug was our first baby - our "fur baby." She has been with us through our early relationship, marriage and eventual expansion to a family of four. As Darcy enters old age, we're very aware of the fact that we will become pet-less at some point in the next few years (although who knows, she could hang on until 14!!)

Last night my oldest daughter and I were talking about pets. She mentioned wanting another pet - a goldfish or a bird. I groaned inwardly, as we all know who ends up caring for "family" pets. I'm not fond of any kind of caged animal or reptile - I find their existence a little sad.

But the conversation did get me thinking more about children, pets and empathy. I feel strongly that children who have animals to care for (and animals who care for them) develop more compassion for our natural world.

So I devised a few questions that parents may want to ask themselves before purchasing a pet:

1) What do you hope your child will get out of the experience?

2) Realistically, how much work do you think your child will be able to put into caring for this pet?

3) Does the "pet" in question match your values and beliefs about humans and our relationship to the natural world? For example, are you comfortable purchasing an exotic pet who's natural environment is thousands of miles away?

4) Are you prepared to explain death to your child, and help them deal with the loss of their pet?

5) Are you prepared to invest in your pet? Depending on what you choose, there will be general maintenance for their living area, food costs, and perhaps veterinary bills. Pets can be expensive!

What questions did you ask yourself before purchasing a pet for your family?

Centre of attention

Before my daughter's fourth birthday a couple of weeks ago we started talking about what kind of party she wanted to have and she declared that she wanted the exact same party she had last year – An hour of play at the Ottawa Gymnastics Centre followed by time in their party room. I booked it immediately, because it's a great place to have a party. The kids get an hour with an instructor in a completely padded room jumping on trampolines, swinging on rings and ropes, climbing and getting worn out by all the activities.

Both years we had a couple of kids who were a bit nervous and wanted a parent with them and the instructor didn't have any problem with having them out on the floor.

Then an hour in the party room to have snacks and cake, with plates, cups and cutlery provided.

If she asks for the same thing next year, I will have no hesitation to do it again!

A Poem for Ty

I met Rachel online through a local Facebook group. Her posts are always touching, and often hilarious. I convinced her to publish something here at Kids in the Capital. This is a poem she wrote for her son...get the kleenex!

A Poem for Ty, With Love from your Mummy

Make time for me mummy Slow down your pace You know what I need Life isn't a race

Let me feel your touch Breathe in your scent Let me lay with you The way babies were meant

Let me run my hands Up and down your arm Let me snuggle and cuddle Safe from all harm

Make time for me mummy I'm not little for long Take me for walks Sing me a song

Let me be carefree Let me set the pace Let's sit here for a while Let me memorize your face

Make time for me mummy I don't need money or stuff Make time for me mummy Your love is enough

In a time when the world Is running around Make time for me mummy The time can be found

We may have less in terms of material things But you'll soon see what joy The time alone with me brings

Painting and laughing Giggles, a book This is how My childhood should look

I won't remember the house The nice cars or eating out But I'll remember the time spent Of that there's no doubt

So make time for me mummy Because when I get old The memories we're making I'll cherish like gold

Rachel Gill is a local Ottawa photographer and mother to 3 year old Ty. For examples of her work or to contact Rachel please visit her Facebook page  or email her at rachcameron@hotmail.com

Welcome to our new Community Manager - Misty

You may have noticed some changes around Kids in the Capital lately - we have a new Community Manager! Ali was such a wonderful asset to the Kids in the Capital community over the last year and we were sad to see her go (thanks for all your hard work Ali!!) but Misty has stepped into the position and we're excited to have her with us.

Misty has been a part of our community for quite a while now.  She is a mom of two girls, four and one and a half, and works in research at The Ottawa Hospital. In her spare time, she's a doula and childbirth educator. Misty moved to Ottawa 8 years ago, and loves raising her children in this city!

Misty will be your contact if you're interested in writing for the blog (we are always looking for more parents to share what they love to see and do with the kids in the Ottawa area!!) or in advertising on the blog (we have a lot of great opportunities for businesses to reach Ottawa families.)  You can always reach her at kidsinthecapital@gmail.com or fill out the form below!

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