Disclaimer: this post contains….opinions

If this pandemic has revealed anything to us (there’s a long list, but let’s stick with two right now) it’s that:

1) For the most part, human beings are a kind and compassionate species willing to put themselves at risk to care for others; and

2) Everyone has an opinion

In the past two months I’ve seen Facebook posts, videos, tweets and IG rants from nurses, doctors, actors, religious leaders, researchers, scientists, epidemiologists, politicians, and the catch-all for us regular folks - “lay people.” All the posts are opinion pieces, and usually start with something along the lines of “I’m a frontline nurse on the ICU unit at such-and-such a hospital, and here’s what I know about coronavirus” OR “I want to preface this by saying I have a PhD from BigDeal University and this is what I think.”

The posts are shared thousands of times, everyone exhausts the “love” or “angry” buttons and epic battles ensue in the comments section. On a much smaller scale, the same thing is occurring on our personal Facebook accounts, should we dare to share something that doesn’t jive well with other folk’s interpretation of this pandemic.

Here in Ottawa where we share close connections with our Quebec neighbours, the recent deviation in our respective governments’ response to the crisis has laid bare our incessant desire to not only voice our opinions, but disguise them as facts and launch them like flaming balls of doggy doo-doo towards the “other side.” As Quebec parents have had to make a tough choice about keeping their kids home or sending them back to school, it appears no one is more equipped to deal with this difficult situation than the parents who don’t actually have to make the decision.

A wise friend recently posted (and read carefully, because this is brilliant): “Having an opinion is the participation trophy of thought. Everyone gets one – that’s about it.” It’s not that your opinion is good or bad, right or wrong. But it’s nothing more than an opinion - so here’s your shiny blue ribbon for participating thank-you-very-much.

Parents have likened the judgment they have received for sending their kids back to school to the tired debate of breast versus bottle feeding, or bed sharing versus crib sleeping. Just when you’ve arrived at the school-aged phase and think you’ve finally moved past the parental righteousness hullabaloo, BAM a pandemic arrives and you’re right back at square one.

Sending our kids back to school amidst a pandemic is a choice, but for many parents the choice is between: send my kids back or lose my job and my income; send my kids back or continue to face poverty; send my kids back or deal with the terrifying reality of a quarantined child with mental health issues or learning difficulties; send my kids back or allow myself to fall into my own pit of hellish despair. For the parents NOT making this choice right now, it’s time to acknowledge your position of privilege (stable jobs that you can do at home, food on the table, healthy and happy kids, good mental health,) and move on.

To all the parents in Quebec: I salute you. I honour your choices, even if they may not fit perfectly with my limited capacity for reasoned judgment; limited, because this situation is so new that even science doesn’t have all the answers. What we do know rests on shaky ground, shifting every day as more is revealed in this new world we find ourselves living in. To admit to a degree of uncertainty is both humble and human. We don’t have all the answers, and we may not for a long time.

Instead of loudly tooting my own horn or proclaiming the answers I think I have, I instead want to recognize what I’m not. I’m not a medical officer of health. I’m not a COVID-studying scientist. I’m not an epidemiologist tracking this new and emerging data. I’m not any kind of “expert,” despite a master’s degree and ten years working in the field of epidemiology. I’m just another person with an opinion.

Misty Pratt is a writer, former health researcher and one of the community managers for Kids in the Capital.